Thursday, November 3, 2011

Hate Week and Honey Badgers

Finally, it's that time of year where any feelings of love, compassion or human kindness must give way to our innermost tendencies toward pure hatred -- thank God Hate Week is back!!!

To start things off properly, I HATE LSU... not as much as Auburn mind you, but it's pretty damn close. With all due respect (or disrespect) for the blood feud / border war that is the Tennessee game, I am lobbying the Tide to temporarily move the Bayou Bengals up from our 3rd biggest rival to our 2nd. Why you ask? It's simple: I HATE LSU much more than Tennessee.

My Armageddon ticket is in grave jeopardy... as some of you know, my precious golden ticket to the Apocalypse has been hanging by a thread for the last few weeks and it looks like my perpetual lucky streak is about to come to an end. To his credit, my friend's sick father has successfully used his life threatening illness to steal the free ticket I was shamelessly mooching off of his son (how dare he?!?). Since all attempts to drive a wedge between father and son have failed, I have no choice but to execute "Plan B" (depicted below) on my friend. I've found it to be a timeless negotiating tactic and should afford me the opportunity to attend the game with the sick father while my buddy "sits this one out". And before you ask, yes the sneaker is mandatory (that's how you do it where I'm from). BTW - in case you might've forgotten... I HATE LSU.

Speaking of HATING LSU... here is a multiple choice question (my favorite type). Of the options listed below, what do YOU consider a REAL honey badger to be? As info, option C would've been much more graphic but I know eViL's mom is a regular reader of the blog. I'll share the poll results next week.

Good luck to everyone's teams this weekend (except Auburn and LSU),


1 comment:

  1. Thank goodness for eViL's sweet mother. Honestly if she didn't frequent this blog, it would have gotten out of hand in here a long time ago....I'm talking Freaknik '96 out of hand.